Twenty Miles

Dustythe journey continues 3 Comments

September 21, 2022

Its been a long stinking journey…that is far from over. You know that term people use. “It’s not a sprint, its a marathon”? Now if you actually have run a marathon, it will resonate with you more, I think. Like, your body is done and your mind is done but you aren’t done yet. You can see the finish line but it looks like its pulling away and you are sure you will never be done. Life isn’t a sprint, it’s a marathon and when you want to be done or you are tired…you have to keep going. You aren’t done yet. Now I totally think it’s okay to sprint portions of life…and I think its okay to walk much of it as well. And I’ll also mention I’m am more of an endurance gal…so that should continue to work for me. I don’t think I’m going anyway fast.

Speaking of marathons. I’m ready for mine to be here and be done. It’s coming quickly and I’m a week behind…so my long long run is like…now. In the next few days. However, it was suppose to be last week. Its okay. It’ll be fine but I am ready to just run it and as the weeks go by I actually feel now like I can run much more of it then I initially thought. Maybe all of it!

It’s quiet here at home and I miss the girls.

I did get to go watch Aly run at MSU last Friday and she was strong. She ran 4th for Cornerstone that day and they ran a 6k which is .62 longer than she is used to racing and that makes is so much harder. Cora’s first race was a 6k as well. She wasn’t too fond of the distance either. (By the way, Cora joined the Moody Cross Country Team last minute)

I’ll probably be all over the place with this blog…

I feel tired still. I feel better but so tired still. Today I dropped Hatcher and came home and went back to bed! I never do that. The initial plan was a 6 mile run but had I done that I may have become swiss cheese! We had a large hail storm! Ouch! Sleep was the better choice but I can tell you that I don’t feel rested. I had my thyroid re-tested and even though I’m on a medication for it…my blood work shows no improvement. So we will asses that at my next appointment.

I went to therapy! Old dusty would never go to therapy. I just talked and cried alot but I think it’s going to be good. One huge perk is its by this restuarant called Bliss and Vinegar and a juice shop called Sip. It’s all so yummy and makes it double worth the drive.

Cross country season is hard. Mark loved it. He was always on watching Alys’ competition and seeing where Kent City sat in the state. He would do hypothetical meets for fun. Every meet he attended he would be in his tennis shoes (unless he was hot off the plane from a trip and if that was the case he would ask me to bring clothes) and comfy clothes…because you never know when you will need to jump a fence or sprint to the next corner. I didn’t always watch the whole meet with Mark because he would just leave me! I would be cheering on the kids and turn and Mark would be off to the next point to watch. He totally ditched me! And there were times when I did try to stay with him but he was fast! Going to meets are weird. I feel ghost-like (as I do in many areas of my life now) and that I’m there but I’m not there. Normally I’m loud and really into it, cheering everyone on and being the social butterfly that I was but now…I feel withdrawn. Quiet. Like I don’t belong. I don’t really want to socialize…I still like people but I don’t want to put forth effort. Hatcher still claims he doesn’t care about running and has no goals but I still get excited for him to PR and am always hoping he does. He told me I can shout out his splits next race.

Homecoming happened and I still had to do hair! Hatcher has quite a mop on his head. He went with Sylvia and all the kids looked so handsome. I think he had fun.


September 25th

I had good intentions but never posted this!

So I DID shout out Hatchers splits and he did PR!! by 8 seconds!! That’s great. I ran into Aly’s coach in Sparta on Saturday (he is kind of local and can’t seem to shake me) and chatted with him and his wife a bit. I really like them. They have really been such a blessing to me and Aly through this whole process. He’s a great coach and he is invested in these kids hearts and it shows. Anyways…he asked me if I feel like I need to step in and fill those Mark’s shoes when it comes to cross-country. I said no. I will continue to play my role but Hatcher never had Mark for a season. Just a little tiny bit…and so maybe my role can be a little different than it would have been otherwise. Like I can mesh a bit of Mark in me without being over the top. He says he doesn’t care but maybe he does a little but doens’t want to because Mark isn’t here…I’m totally just guessing. Worth a convo with him though.

Aly runs Saturday in Louiville, Cora runs Friday night at Layola and Hatcer runs Saturday at Shepherd. I know shepherd and Louiville are PR courses but not sure about Layola. I’d love to go to them all…but I can’t.

So I DID run that 20 miles and I’m so glad its done. I don’t know how to explain all of this to you guys. This summer I could barely run. 5 miles was my max and it was slow and pathetic and I had to walk a bunch. Really discouraging but at the same time I was okay with it. Now on Friday I set out at 8am in my new Zyia 8″ hustle shorts because they have pockets..a high rise waist and they are long on the legs so I won’t chafe. I threw on a long sleeve because, oh my goodness, it was 36 degrees out! I had packed my fanny pack the night before and my phone, airpods and watch were all fully charged. I had set electrolytes and food out on the course and I had food packed in “fanny”. I was ready to roll. About .5 miles in my hands were freezing!!!! I never thought to grab little gloves. I had to pull my sleeves out and over my hands and tuck my thumbs. I practiced eating food every 40 minutes (about 4 miles) and getting electrolytes every 20. I put out way too many water bottles! I felt really good well past 10 miles and had not walked. I listened to a book for 2 hours and 44 minutes til switching to praise and worship music for the last 45 minutes. I realized pureed food is best because chewing, running, and breathing is too hard. It was garbage day around Hess Lake so I could dispose of all my trash as well. The lake area is rolly but I seemed to be getting up hills way better than I had 2 months ago. I had a twinge in my knee just a couple miles in and knew some of my muscles were just way too tight and that was going to be a problem (around the outside of my knees) and it did pester me a bit but I think it will be okay. Lots of massage and stretching these next two weeks! I felt like the last 1.5 miles I picked up the pace and once I hit 20 I stopped. I walked the last .3 miles. I did develope a side stitch the last .5 miles. Super weird. The worse part was that those pained areas felt like rigor mortis and my legs didn’t want to stride the same but otherwise I had plenty of energy and felt good. My arches though!!! They are so sore and knotted up!! I’m ready for 26.2. I’m going to keep my self as limber and together as I can, get to Chicago, run the race and enjoy it!! I’ll have my kidney jersey on and represent the National Kidney Foundation and I even submitted Mark’s story so we shall see if they showcase it. I hope to be smiling when I step over the finish line and I hope to run all of it. I’m already thnking about where I want to eat after! People say I’m doing it for Mark but I can’t do anything for Mark, but I do feel like I’m representing our story as I run and I do feel like I’m running for a good cause. The race is October 9th at 8:30 Chicago time. I’ll be on the course for 4.5-5 hours (all depending on how I feel)

Aly came home this weekend and since it’s just been me and Hatcher it really felt like a party. Saturday night we did homemade pizzas and Felicity and Kiyah came over as well as one of Hatcher’s friends. We watched A Beautiful Mind but we forgot to have dessert. The only thing missing was Cora. I get to see her in 2 weeks!! (1 if I go to Layola)

I did an interview!! It was with AwareNow official magazine and podcast. When it’s done I’ll share a link.

Why is Christmas on my mind like crazy? And am I going to put forth a lot of effort to try to make it nice only for it to just be over emotional anyways?

Also I ran into someone at the grocery store. She said, “are you dusty?” I was like, yeah…and then stared at her so I could put her face with a place so I could then put a name with that face…but she didn’t wait. She could see my brain twirling. She was one of my playground aids from elementary school! She asked how I was and how the kids were…I said “ok”. She told me I was a tough cookie. I told her even cookies crumble.

The I realized…ya know. A well made cookie, even when broken and bitten into, doesn’t always fall apart.

Comments 3

  1. But, it’s ok to crumble! And all those little pieces taste just as good!
    Thanks for being real Dusty!
    As my legs and balance fade daily, living through you running!!
    Praying for you and your heart, my friend!

  2. Dusty,
    Thank you for sharing this leg of your journey. I don’t know that I could be equally honest and eloquent if I was in your shoes.
    I pray for you and the kids often.

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