How many hats can one gal wear?

DustyMark's Journey, Uncategorized

September 13th

So not only will I be (co)responsible for giving Mark dialysis every day (5 days a week) but I have also become his personal masseuse. The pain in his back has been overwhelming. If his gut feels okay, his back is killing him. I can only think that this is a direct by-product (yes, I believe that was an oxymoron) of being in the hospital, not moving, laying in a bed, pain meds and volatile vomitting. It takes about a week to mess your system up and if you work really hard, you might rebound in twice that time IF you were feeling well. The amount of activity Mark gets in on day now equals LESS than the movement he would put forth to get ready for work in the morning on a typical pre-diagnosis day. How does one “get in more activity” when your energy level is about the same as a slug? So I have been trying to work out knots and discovered it may be more at the IT band and at least I can try to aleviate that but I don’t really know what I’m doing and I have no idea how people do this for a living. My hope is that the muscles start to feel better and he has a bit more energy that he can do more stretching and walk more so he can move forward. But that is just one piece of this big puzzle.

I listened to a coupel testimonies of people overcoming kidney cancer. The difference is, they had 2 kidneys. They could handle chemotherapy, they weren’t on dialysis and their cancer was of the “normal” kind. This is what bewilders me. He only has one kidney! Of all the places to get cancer, it was there. Not only that, they can’t identify what type of renal cancer it is so no treatment can be started.

We did call Dr. Campbells office today and learned that even though he is working this week (he takes every other week off) he won’t be able to see us in the office for 2 more weeks. This got me all fired up! I read the reports today…10.5cm is 4″. I also read .9″ and I read 1/3″. I read metastasize. I read tumor thrombus. Is this really how this process goes? Is it really not of an urgent matter? Or is it just me being an overbearing wife? We recieved a call back from Campbell’s office and we were told he WOULD talk to Mayo today and if the plan changed at all, we would get a phone call. I am trying to be positive. I am trying to not be angry. I am tring to not say stupid sarcastic things.

We had 2 more appointments after dialysis. We forged out in that downpour to get to #2 and that was so exhausting (but productive) that Mark couldn’t do #3 and had to come home to sleep.

The reality of the future was a bit more real today as far as how we deal with bills/insurance etc. We were able to meet with someone and ask all the questions (we still have more). (No this is not a cry for help, I’m just talking about he process. Maybe the parts people don’t talk about) Mark made a comment driving today…”it doesn’t matter how much you plan and how much you save, it all can change very quickly” (that’s not word for word). And he is right. I don’t think we should throw all caution to the wind but when you work really hard for one certain path in life…you might have to take a detour and then you are up a creek without a paddle. (everyone would be, no one plans for this) It’s hard to concentrate on just getting better when you have to fill out paperwork, make appointments, have meetings and make the phone calls. I’m so thankful that I do not have to grocery shop and make meals right now. That one might put me over the edge.

I have to say…I am so thankful for our church family, community, friends and family (near and far) who have jumped in to alleviate household chores, meals, physical work and have sent encouraging cards, letters and texts. I have been made very aware of how blessed we are and I trust God will continue to bless us, even in little ways we might not expect. I had no idea how many elements of life change when something like this happens. No idea. Now I do. Now I can be more passionate and understanding.

Tomorrow Mark gets his sutures out from his catheter.

Oh and Aly is on homecoming court. She’s as pleased as punch. (is that a saying?)

I think I figured out how to place photos in here….so I’ll start taking more.